Coaching into potential

By Ed Perez
As told to Gabriel Bennett
Edited by Sheridan Block

My mother was always a woman of faith. When violence made its way to my town in Cuba in the 1950s, she put her head down and prayed. There was a level of peace about her after she opened her eyes — it was amazing — not only because she was able to stay calm with the fighting outside our home, but also because that peace translated to my entire family. We could have all died that day, but her smile gave us peace. That moment taught me two things. First, our attitude impacts those around us. And second, that faith is not what comes out of your mouth, but what comes out of your heart.

I have lived and will die by these values.

Seeing the potential

My story starts in Cuba in 1963 and is the reason for who I am today. My family was made up of successful business owners in Cuba in the 1950s, and after Fidel Castro took control in 1959, we lost everything. After my family was naturalized, we started from the bottom in the United States with nothing but a plate and utensils, a few pairs of clothes, and hope for our new life.

Coming to the United States was the most difficult blessing of my life. Unable to understand English, it was difficult for my family to navigate this new culture. The most confusing aspect of American culture was that there were perfectly functional appliances on the curb on their way to the dump. You would never see that in Cuba. I quickly learned that Thursday was trash day, and my mother and I would go out every week treasure hunting.

The first treasure we found was an iron and an ironing board. We saw an opportunity here, so we put business cards around our neighborhood to start our first business ironing people’s clothes. Two weeks later, I found a sewing machine sitting on a curb just a couple of blocks away from where I found the iron. It was only missing one piece: the needle. I carried that heavy piece of machinery back to our tiny apartment, and shortly after that, I went and invested in thread, a new needle, and more business cards to get our second business up and running.

Within a few weeks of being in the United States, my family started two small businesses, and my dad had a full-time job. I believe that my family’s story of trying to navigate our new life in the United States in the first month of our arrival shows us what is possible when you have little. What was considered trash to some was pure gold to me.

There’s gold everywhere, but many of us don’t see it. I encourage each of us to find the gold in our homes and in our hearts and share it with those who need it most. Bless those who saw an old iron and a sewing machine as trash. It was more valuable to me than they knew.

Coaching My Potential

After making a new life in Miami, my family relocated to Baltimore and I started high school in a vocational school. I was an angry child, and I didn’t know where to put my energy. It was easy to place it in the world around me, and it wasn’t until my sophomore year that I started to figure out how to control it. A coach at my school saw potential in me, and despite my several attempts to push him away, he continued to believe in me. He got to know me, heard my story, and, even if I never said it, he understood that I wanted to be something good.

He told me that anger is a tricky thing and that there are two kinds: positive and negative. Negative anger steered the path I was headed down, where it is used to push people down. This kind of anger destroys you. The second kind, however, can be channeled for positive change.

My coach taught me that sports were a way to use my anger for good — and it did. Pursuing sports in high school gave me a purpose, and a chance to finally win at something for the first time in years. It was my salvation. And the only reason it was possible was because my mentor never gave up on me. He saw good in my heart where no one else did, and I will forever be grateful. His grace is why I was able to rise through the years and, after decades of climbing the ranks in a Fortune 500 company, I founded a nonprofit dedicated to a mission to end homelessness, empower women, and assist children in need.

Three Grains of Rice

We can change the world through social responsibility and volunteerism. At Three Grains of Rice, we Connect Hearts and Change Lives. To do this, I ask people two questions, and then follow up with a statement:

What is your greatest pain point?

Where do you wish you were right now?

This is how I can help…

These are the questions I wish I was asked when I started anew in a foreign country at 13 years old, but I am grateful that I am the one able to ask them now.

In northeast Florida, I am leading efforts to construct permanent housing for people experiencing homelessness and single mothers. I offer resources to these individuals, and to local shelter facilities. I also offer higher education funding for disadvantaged women, provide assistance following natural disasters, and send medical supplies to Cuba and Ukraine. Along with this, I have an obligation to God to share his love and mercy with all people, which is why I assist all immigrants in need. I am committed to giving them a chance to build a new foundation, both in their new homes and in their hearts.

Building up the next generation

We have to take the time to mentor young people. If they push back, it does not mean that they are lost with no way to return. This is exactly what I did, and my mentor did not give up on me. I encourage people to find opportunities to bring volume to young people’s lives. Find their strengths and build upon where they still need to grow. Find ways to channel their strengths to develop their weaknesses — and, most importantly, never give up.

My story is not about me, it is about the message. I was sent to share my story so that I may impact all the lives I cross, even if it is just one at a time.